Creating Your Happiness Series: A Journey to Glow Up

Part 1. Self-Care Routine

What’s wrong Sis?  A broken heart, glass ceiling at work, unplanned pregnancy, loss of a loved one, trying to make a dollar out of fifteen cents, again?

The thing these all have in common is thereare no quick fixes.  For instance, Sure you can remedy a broken heart with a rebound but that’s only a bandage and your goal is to heal; to be happy.  So, let’s start here, at Self-Care.  First what is Self-Care? GoodTherapy.org describes the term self-care as“the actions that an individual might take to reach optimal physical and mental health. Self-care can also refer to activities that an individual engages in to relax or attain emotional well-being, such as meditating, journaling, or visiting a counselor.”

Exploring these activities as you journey to happiness can be quite fulfilling and helpful to you when life’s storms hit you hard.  The first thing you can do is create a space that is peaceful and calming. Try creating a meditation place in your bedroom or your favorite part of your home. Remember to make it comfortable with a pillow or blanket to sit on and just be silent.  Meditation can be as simple as a saying a prayer or repeating an affirmation.  You can use this time to cleanse your spacethroughthe ancient practice of smudging, burning sage to cleanse the air in your meditation space replacing any negative energy with strength prosperity and balance.  You can also sage yourself by allowing the smoke to pass over you to cleanse your aura.  Pushback the frustration, anger, resentment and allow yourself to grieve your loss or receive acceptance of this change in your life.You will begin to feel lighter, the weight lifting a bit off your shoulders.

Next, put the phone down and pick up a pen and a notebook.  Running to social media is probably one of the worst things you can do when you’re not feeling your best.  Most importantly dumping your personal issues into news feeds won’t help your problems either.  If you need to vent or get things off your chest, put them in a journal.  Completely judgement free and private,ifyou keep it that way, journaling can be therapeutic because likemeditation you are alone with your own thoughts.  You canexplore your thoughts and develop possible solutions to your problems. For example, glass ceilinghas you feeling hopeless or frustrated?  Come up with a strategy of how you can take a new direction in your career.  Take a new perspective; is it a ceilingor is it a fork in the road?  Perhaps this is your opportunity to venture on a new career path that’s more in line with your family’s needs or your personal long-term goals.  Broken heart?  Social media is not the way to go.  Don’t slander your ex on your page or lurk on their page hoping to catch a glimpse of their new lover.  Girl no… Put the phone down and pick up a pen.  Why did the relationship end?  What can you learn from it?  How can you grow from this change in your love life?  And, cry about it.  Let’s face it, having your heart broken sucks. Even if your angry or bitter the feelings all come from a place of hurt and that’s ok.  Journaling can help you to be honest about these feelings and channel them in a healthy manner. You won’t hurt forever and it won’t take forever for you to heal.

In the Black Community therapy is almost taboo. This is slowly changing as more of us are being open about mental health issues and the need to talk to someone more qualified to help us through these tough times.  Listen, the stuff of life isn’t easy and you don’t have to go at it alone.  Counselors are paid to listen to you, it’s their job to listen and they can help you find the answers within yourself.  In the same manner that we confide in friends, our hairstylists, or religious leaders, counselors will listen and guide you but confidentially.  There are laws that prohibit medical professionals from releasing your private information.  So, unlike your hairstylist who may run tell that your secrets are safe, with a professional. 

My hope in this series is to help anyone who is struggling with being happy. Happiness most certainly cannot be bought or faked.  It is created and it’s the best DIY project you’ll ever start. Subscribe to stay up to date and receive notifications for the next installment in the Creating Your Happiness Series. Also follow us on Instagram and Twitter for daily inspiration to lift your spirits and get you started on your journey to glow up.

Article by Tina McEachin

@heyitsxotina

 

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